Friday, 3 January 2014

One Little Word 2014 - REDISCOVER

I chose a word a few years ago, that has seemed to follow me into every year since, and that word is BALANCE. I have decided that for 2014, I want to have an additional word - I still think about balance a lot, and I continue to try and achieve balance in my life, but I wanted another word to focus on other parts of my life. That word is REDISCOVER. Over the years, I think I have "lost" aspects of myself - things that I used to enjoy, but found that life/family/work just overtook everything else, and I dropped things. This year I plan to REDISCOVER these things.

Relationships - it has been a stressful year for Mark and I. He has had lots of challenges with work, learning new protocols and procedures, and having to adapt to a new culture and work ethic that is the US Navy ;) Sometimes he comes home and he is like "bah humbug!!!" and he just wants to shut himself away or go to the gym. I have found being a SAHM here hard to adapt to. My house is much larger than I am used to, so the housework has tripled. I sometimes feel isolated, being in a country far from home. Sometimes the cultural differences are hard to comprehend. Our kids are getting older, so there comes challenges with that too. We need to rediscover ourselves as a couple, and it is proving harder that we thought. So I really need to concentrate on this in 2014.

Music - I love music - playing, singing, just listening to it. I have a guitar that I rarely pick up anymore, I bought myself a flute with the aim of learning, but never got round to it. I see my 9th grade daughter enjoying being part of her High School Chorus, and I long to be a part of a choir again.

Scrapbooking - I really dropped the ball with this in 2013. I burned myself out a bit from being on a Design Team, and although I loved the work I produced, I didn't  always like the deadlines. I took a break, which turned out to be almost a year. I started Project Life, and did 2 weeks. I am planning on doing Project Life again this year, doing a one page spread a week. And I am going to start making up page kits for regular scrapping too. I have so many photos and stories from the 18 months that we have lived in the US so far, but I think I only have scrapped photos from our first weekend!

Friendships - being far from home has advantages and disadvantages. We don't get the family dramas, but we also miss our friends. I am in a situation in that there are 10 other British guys doing the same thing as DH. And 9 other wives. Some of us get on. Some of us most definitely DON'T. The ones I get on with are all younger than me. They are like my younger sisters. They are all either starting families or have young families, and sometimes in this past year things have happened that make me realise that while they are all starting this phase, it is ending for me. Which makes me sad. So I distance myself. And they notice. And that makes me sad too. I am excited for all these new babies, I truly am, but when you realise that your ability to have babies yourself is coming to an end, it hits hard. I need to rediscover how to approach these friendships. I also need to rediscover friends I have made since being here, that I have lost touch with. I need to rediscover my old friends back home too, and catch up with their news. I am really bad at this. I need to start putting in the effort.


Myself - I just need to rediscover what makes me ME! I had it for a while, but it has gotten lost again. I need to let go of things, reclaim things, make decisions based on what is right for me and not just what will please everyone else. I miss not working - visa issues mean that it is illegal for me to get a job without first going through the Embassy to get a work permit. I quite enjoyed being known for myself, and not just as Tom or Jemma's Mum, or as Mark's wife.  I was just Sarah - it said so on my name badge lol.  After 18 months of not working, the novelty is wearing off. And once again I am just Tom's Mom, Jemma's Mom, or Mark's wife (or someone else's wife, but that is a whole 'nother story  ;) ) 


Another thing I am hoping to rediscover this year is blogging! Hmm, I think I say that every year hahahaha..... But, this year I am aiming for success!!

Anyway, Happy New Year, hoping 2014 brings health and happiness, and that all your wishes come true!

Sarah xxx





                  

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