No, I feel unstable in a different way. I am trying to balance stuff again, and seeing as my circumstances have drastically changed so much in the last year, I just thought it would be pretty straightforward to pick up where I left off once the boxes were unpacked. Umm, no. And it's taken months for me to realise this.
I am still exploring my new surroundings. Encountering new things on a daily basis. And sometimes, I just get so overwhelmed that I just become a hermit. I won't leave the house (apart from grocery shopping) for a week. Then I go all out the next week and meet a different friend for coffee every day. Then I hide for a week. Lather, rinse, repeat.
I was reading something on a message board a couple of months back, and found I sympathised with some posters on the thread. And they called themselves introverts. I looked into it, and found that I too am an introvert. I find constantly being around people can be exhausting - like they are draining the energy from me. I need quiet days by myself to recover. Don't get me wrong, I love going out with people, and socialising, but I can't do it all the time. Certainly no every weekend. Mark and I were talking about this one night. And he said we were both unstable introverts. He has done a course about it for work, and knows a darn sight more about it than me ;) We both wondered whether we were always like this, or that our circumstances had made us this way.
When we were first married, we spent nearly every weekend with his best friend and his wife. We never felt zapped of energy with them. It was just normal. Then we had kids, and we were posted abroad. Our friends divorced while we were abroad. We have always lived away from family, which has made us very independent. Did it also make us introverts? Even when back in the UK, we pretty much kept ourselves to ourselves. Mark's frequent deployments meant that when he was home, he wanted to do things with the family, and not socialise with the guys he had spent 6 weeks in a tent with.
Now, once more, we have been posted overseas. We live in a community where arms have been spread open to welcome us. We have made a lot of new friends, and we also have some old ones that were also posted across with us. There have been weekends where we have had invites out Friday, Saturday and Sunday. By Monday I am exhausted. At the moment we have visitors - the inlaws - and I know that by the time they leave, I'll be so ready for them to go! I hate having to be "on" all the time, I need to switch off, and my MIL, well, she needs to be doing something. All. the. time. Or talking. Or asking questions. LOL. It just gets a bit much, and then I get cranky, and mark and I end up falling out... ;)
I am not really sure why I need to write this post. Maybe I am just wanting a place to get it down and out of my head. I am wanting to craft, but can't as the guest room is also my craft space, and I had to pack some stuff away for the visitors.
But I am torn. I no longer have design team obligations, but I am reluctant to scrap. I have a ton of new photos. I have a ton of old photos. I have a ton of really old photos. I even started Project Life, but lost my drive. I am trying out new crafts, more sewing and less papercraft. I also want to make some jewellery. And quilt. I am so in love with quilting just now. I have at least a dozen quilts I want to make!! I am also running. But that's a whole other post...
I'll leave you with a family shot of us at St Augustine, taken on a day trip during Spring Break. And yes, I was frozen. I had gloves on. It's not all sunshine and cocktails here in North East Florida ya know...
Catch y'all soon ;)
Sarah xxx
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